Blog Posts

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Resolution… or Just Do It

I’m not a huge believer in resolutions. If you have a resolve to do something useful and dynamic, something outside of your norm that you think will take your life beyond, start immediately. Why wait for some special time of your life, like a 30th birthday or January 1?

So this won’t be a post about how I’m going to be so much more awesome in 2012, and how I’m going to do things differently for the new year. I’ve been reflecting on how to improve my professional profile, connections and knowledge for a while. In my personal life, I learn from my conversations with family, friends and my significant other and that informs the decisions I make.

As I’ve grown older, I recognize my personal symptoms of ennui: a sense of restlessness, a general irritation at stagnation. These all propel me into action to get beyond my “wall.”

Moving into the new job (gulp!), I am finding inspiration in a book I’m reading: Sophia Nelson’s Black Woman Redefined: Dispelling Myths and Discovering Fulfillment in the Age of Obama. I initially heard Ms. Nelson speak at the professional development conference from the Young Professionals subgroup of the Urban League of Greater Dallas. Although we are separated by a generation, and lots of income, her passion for empowering men and women to recognize their own power to make a change in themselves, their communities and their companies, whether they work for themselves or someone else, stayed with me after the event was over. I’ve been following her on Twitter, and she is prolific in her communication. She hosts #KnowURValue chats that bring some good advice from her community, and takes me to church almost every morning. Suffice it to say, you need to get up on her book.

Now that I’ve enjoyed a quiet New Year celebration, no club for me thank you very much, I’m enjoying these black eyed peas, cornbread and coleslaw. My prayers go to you and yours in 2012. Start it on the right foot with a prayer/meditation and then go be awesome!

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What’s on my mind – December 19, 2011

This week has been full of pop culture conversations. Just wanted to share some of the things I’ve been discussing with friends.

The “If I Were A Poor Black Kid” article: No one article has been more discussed and derided in my circle of friends and on the blogs I read than this article from Forbes writer Gene Marks. Upon reading it, I initially shook my head and gave it a simple “really dude?!” and kept moving. However, over the days following I read some very impassioned responses to the uninformed ignorance that Marks tried to pass off as actionable advice for children in poverty. The Root has done a nice roundup of the articles; my favorite is from Cord Jefferson at Good. I’d love to see an actual response from Gene Marks. I may be wishing upon a star for that one.

The recent report on obesity, Black women and self-esteem: I had mixed feelings about this report. On the one hand, it’s fantastic that these women, according to the findings of the study, don’t feel that their feelings of worth are dependent upon their weight. On the other hand, the staggering numbers about obesity in the African American community cannot be ignored. Shaming women into weight loss is not a solution. An honest conversation about how to improve access to fresh foods, knowledge about fit lifestyles and changing values about childhood nutrition is the beginning.

The This Week in Blackness blog: hilarious and I almost cried laughing while listening. A definite must-read blog.

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Don’t Hide Your Light Under a Bushel

If there is one edict that has stayed with me from my impatient youth to 26-going-on-27, it’s that if you use patience and wait out the tide, eventually it turns and everything gets better. I posted back in October that some days are just “might don’t make it days,” where you have to chalk it up that life has the better of you and keep it moving. And sometimes those days string together to the point where you wonder where the end is.

After the past week I’ve had, I feel like I’m on a mountaintop after coming through a valley. And I’m not hiding my light and blessing under a bushel. On Friday a long-sought job offer came through. It was such an overwhelming feeling after a few seasons of feeling like my skill set was lacking, after getting the “sorry but no” call or email or no call at all (which is so incredibly unprofessional I can’t even speak on that). I went to my mental prayer closet before I got the call. I’ve always liked that concept, taking your prayers and desires straight up on high. No interruptions, no distractions, just a conversation. One shouldn’t reject the path He chooses, and that was my desire: to understand that if the answer was no, it didn’t mean “never” it meant “not right now.”

When I got off the phone, I was shaking like I’d just been in a fender bender (speaking from experience here). Hands shaking, nerves slightly raw. It was just joy, coursing through my veins. With this new opportunity, I feel a rejuvenation of energy. If there is one thing I can’t take, it’s stagnancy. Whether it’s work, education, friendships or romantic relationships, I think you should always be moving forward. Discovering new things, new concepts, new levels. In no way am I disparaging any past loves or jobs, but you do reach a fork in the road sometimes and you have to decide which way you’re going to go. It’s feeling like a road less traveled right now, but I know I chose the right one.

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When the Best Intentions Go Awry

Wow, I had every intention of blogging regularly this month. Time ran away like it’d stolen my wallet. I looked up and it was Thanksgiving, which was doubly important to me this year with my sister being in town. So my brain was on “gorge stomach with food and wine, sit around watching judge shows, laugh and enjoy family/friends” mode. And I loved every moment of it.

Now it’s final papers, which are truly kicking my butt. I had a moment last night, after spending three hours on the paper and feeling like all I did was move text around on the page. A good Google search told me that literature reviews can easily read as annotated bibliographies, and I need to be cognizant of keeping an analytic eye as I parse the literature. I’m struggling with that because I feel like James Woods in that episode of Family Guy. You know the one…

Except my exclamations are “Ooh, a good article! Ooh, a good article!” on LexisNexis, JSTOR, EBSCO and all those fantastic research databases. As I told my family, my intention in pursuing my degree was to be challenged, yes, but I also want to be super awesome at it all. I knew when I woke up this morning, after only four-five hours of sleep (not even good sleep at that), and I was already in a crap mood that it was time to take a deep breath. I have to realize that more than likely, no one will fail me so long as I’ve put forth a sincere effort, which I have. And while my classmates were lamenting their draft reviews, I only got grammatical corrections. (Not bragging…okay, maybe a little bit.)

I’m back on it tonight, but I’m switching gears to my other beautiful project, a content analysis. At this point, that seems like a piece of cake…Ooh, a piece of cake!

XOXO

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When the Best Intentions Go Awry

Wow, I had every intention of blogging regularly this month. Time ran away like it’d stolen my wallet. I looked up and it was Thanksgiving, which was doubly important to me this year with my sister being in town. So my brain was on “gorge stomach with food and wine, sit around watching judge shows, laugh and enjoy family/friends” mode. And I loved every moment of it.

Now it’s final papers, which are truly kicking my butt. I had a moment last night, after spending three hours on the paper and feeling like all I did was move text around on the page. A good Google search told me that literature reviews can easily read as annotated bibliographies, and I need to be cognizant of keeping an analytic eye as I parse the literature. I’m struggling with that because I feel like James Woods in that episode of Family Guy. You know the one…

Except my exclamations are “Ooh, a good article! Ooh, a good article!” on LexisNexis, JSTOR, EBSCO and all those fantastic research databases. As I told my family, my intention in pursuing my degree was to be challenged, yes, but I also want to be super awesome at it all. I knew when I woke up this morning, after only four-five hours of sleep (not even good sleep at that), and I was already in a crap mood that it was time to take a deep breath. I have to realize that more than likely, no one will fail me so long as I’ve put forth a sincere effort, which I have. And while my classmates were lamenting their draft reviews, I only got grammatical corrections. (Not bragging…okay, maybe a little bit.)

I’m back on it tonight, but I’m switching gears to my other beautiful project, a content analysis. At this point, that seems like a piece of cake…Ooh, a piece of cake!

XOXO

 

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On Diet and Personal Choice

As part of my liberal (nearly socialist, if you ask my mother) indoctrination, I have grown to love NPR. When I got satellite radio with my new car about two years ago, listening to Michel Martin and “Tell Me More” became part of my morning routine much like coffee and email. On Friday, catching a rebroadcast of the Thursday program, I got to hear quite a discussion called “Put Down the Fork – Lay Off the Pork.” Michel had two guests: Natalie Moore, who recently wrote an article for The Root called “In Praise of Pork,” and filmmaker Byron Hurt (Soul Food Junkies).

As a recent convert to vegetarianism, I will say, bacon is one of the meats that I miss the absolute most. I can go without pork chops, would never touch chitterlings (or chitlins, depending upon your upbringing) and appreciate sausage. But there is something about that smell, the crunch, the combination of salty-sweet when you add it to pancakes…just joyful. I will say, my vegetarianism isn’t about religion or diet. It was a combination of my boyfriend’s eating habits (never had meat in his life) and me wanting to challenge myself. It’s the same reason I went natural: something I’ve never done before. Would it be difficult? The only thing I can say is that when I get hungry, bordering on hangry (hungry + angry) or tungry (tired + hungry), the only thing I can think of is a good fast-food cheeseburger. I’ve been tempted many a times to swerve into Whatburger after my Monday or Tuesday night class.

As I was listening to the very friendly debate on Tell Me More, one line that Natalie said struck a nerve. She mentions staying with a friend, who happened to be from the South. The family made breakfast, which included pork. Her explanation for going back on her no-pork stance (at that point in her life) was that she had “home training” and couldn’t say she didn’t eat it. I just can’t agree with that. I’m a Southerner, with home training, but if I don’t eat something, I’m not going to change my stance simply because a friend, or boyfriend’s, family cooked it. There is nothing impolite about simply saying “I’m afraid I don’t eat that, thank you.” Done, move along. This notion of Southern politeness, and to some extent, femininity defined by Southern edicts, really gets folks messed up in the game.

How long will I be a vegetarian? I’m not wholly sure. I will tell you this, I’m about to get it in on some turkey and stuffing come Thanksgiving. I call it a vacation of sorts, pretty excited about it.

On the school note, just wrapped (quite last minute :-/) my bibliography for theory class. Now I need to go into seclusion to start on the content analysis for research class and the literature review for theory. No…I’m serious. I need to go away from the Internet and text messaging, it’s the devil!

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When Things Get Real, The Real Goes to New York

I will gladly admit: I took a mental vacation. I went to see my friends in New York, and I pretended like I was young again, without a care or career in the world. And I had a great time. The last few weeks have been…intense to say the least. Not really one to put it all out there, but my network of “talk you off the ledge” friends and family were tapped.

Increasingly, grad school is showing me who is in charge. I’ve selected my topics for research and theory class semester projects, both of which I’m extremely excited to explore, as are my professors (no pressure, right?). But this past weekend, that was all for me. I shopped, ate, strolled the city, got snowed in, watched scary movies and just thoroughly enjoyed myself. I had great hosts in my college friend Mychael, and his awesome roommate, Devere (happy birthday, boo!). After all that excitement and activity, it was quite nice to be home.

Now that I’m back, I’ll be focusing on these research projects. In the driest of tones, after realizing that no one had started their content analysis portion yet, Dr. Christie (research) told us “It might be a good time to begin.” I’ve never been one to believe that fat meat isn’t greasy, so I’m taking his advice.

I also owe you and myself a review of the Dallas Urban League Young Professionals Ready. Set. Grow. conference that I attended a couple of weeks ago. I have some notes and lingering thoughts on the event, which was excellent.

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Two Pictures Worth 1,000 Words

I came across two pictures that currently matter to me:

The Tea Party and the Occupiers: Can They Just Get Along?

This Venn diagram is from a great Slate article on the similarities and differences between Occupy Wall Street and the Team Party movements. Why this matters? After the head scratching  three-hour brainstrom session in which I tried to narrow my research choices, I found inspiration in the latest news cycles. Seeing as I’m supposed to either believe that the Occupy Wall Street demonstrators are a bunch of rude, dirt-encrusted ne’er-do-wells who just want to rob the rich or they’re the noble, progressive alternative to the crass and crotchety Tea Party, I decided on a textual analysis of the media coverage both groups received in the first 30 days. After presenting in class, I feel secure that this is simple enough to be manageable but could still be expanded upon in the future.

Personally, I would love to explore the lack of minority representation in both of these movements. As a black woman solidly within the demographic fit of the Occupy Wall Street protesters (middle class, college educated, etc.) I and several people I know like me is not going to spend precious time camping out in public to hold up signs and be a spectacle for media searching for a story. I’d rather be looking for a job and interviewing (if that was my issue like some of the protesters) or networking or anything other than standing still.

The second image that is of interest to me has to do with my industry.

According to the 2011 IBM Global Chief Marketing Officer Study (via Marketing Profs), there is a significant gap between the number of executives who report an high expected “level of complexity” in marketing and the actual number of those executives who feel prepared for this complexity. As the graph handily points out, this is a 31 percent gap. The rest of the report details the following slightly troublesome data:

  • 82 percent of CMOs plan to increase the use of social media but 68 percent of CMOs reporting unpreparedness for social media. I wonder how they plan to get past this 14 percent deficit between those who recognize the need for more social media and those who are not prepared to do just that.
  • Some communication folks may be tired of the “content is king” trope but it appears to be true. Categorized as “data explosion” and explained as “the increasing volume, variety, and velocity of data available from new digital sources such as social networks,” 71 percent of respondents indicated this as an area of unpreparedness (seeing a pattern here?).
Sadly, a lot of these areas of need can be filled by adequately training the less senior positions but companies are trying to be so “lean” that training and actual experience to teach employees is lacking.
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Inspiration

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The sunrise and sunset always make me feel closer to my source of life. Since I’m far from a morning person, I have to use the evening to gain perspective. Often I’m stuck at my desk all day, and leaving work is my first taste of fresh air in eight hours. So get your deep breath! It gives you something new.

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It’s All a Process

I think I hit my first wall this week, when I sat down to write my research proposal. As my boyfriend said, “It’s like telling someone they can go on vacation anywhere in the world but they can only pick one place.” I sat for three hours and felt that old frustration from undergrad. No, actually it was worse. In my early 20s, time wasn’t as valuable as it is now. You work on something, you nap, you play online, you watch a marathon of “Law & Order” and then you get back to work. Now it’s  you work for actual money, you hustle for additional ways to possibly make money, you keep up on the news, you keep up with your friends who are becoming increasingly distant due to marriage, kids and their own work, you try to sneak in some TV and then you work on extra stuff like grad school.

I’ve had some frustrations this week, and I’m not quite sure when they’ll be resolved. As I mentioned previously, some days just aren’t for it. We all have them. The other day, riding and listening to NPR (also known as mental down time), they reviewed a graduation speech that the recently deceased Steve Jobs gave back in 2005 at Stanford. In it, he says:

No one wants to die. Even people who want to go to heaven don’t want to die to get there. And yet death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because Death is very likely the single best invention of Life. It is Life’s change agent. It clears out the old to make way for the new. Right now the new is you, but someday not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it is quite true.

Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

I was moved, to tears. How beautiful to have a death sentence over your head, and to live with such grace. I’m not sure what I’ll do with my frustrations, but I know I have control of where I’m going. I will not let the “noise of others’ opinions,” which can often be quite loud and press in from all sides, be the story of my life right now. Chin high, shoulders back, carrying on.